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If
the child does not learn the way you teach, then teach the way the child learns.        

Children
and Television (Poem taken from Roald Dahl's book, Charlie and The
Chocolate Factory) "The most important thing we've learned, So far
as children are concerned, Is never, NEVER, NEVER let Them near your television
set- Or better still, just don't install The idiotic thing at all.
In almost every house we've been, We've watched them gaping at the screen.
They loll and slop and lounge about, And stare until their eyes pop out.
(Last week in someone's place we saw A dozen eyeballs on the floor.) They
sit and stare and stare and sit Until they're hypnotized by it, Until
they're absolutely drunk With all that shocking ghastly junk. Oh yes,
we know it keeps them still, They don't climb out the window sill, They
never fight or kick or punch, They leave you free to cook the lunch And
wash the dishes in the sink- But did you ever stop to think, To wonder
just exactly what This does to your beloved tot? IT ROTS THE SENSES IN
THE HEAD! IT KILLS IMAGINATION DEAD! IT CLOGS AND CLUTTERS UP THE MIND!
IT MAKES A CHILD SO DULL AND BLIND HE CAN NO LONGER UNDERSTAND A FANTASY,
A FAIRY LAND! HIS BRAIN BECOMES AS SOFT AS CHEESE! HE CANNOT THINK- HE
ONLY SEES! 'All right!' you'll cry. 'All right' you'll say, 'But if
we take the set away, What shall we do to enertain Our darling children?
Please explain!' We'll answer this by asking you, 'What used the darling
ones to do? 'How used they keep themselves contented Before this monster
was invented? Have you forgotten? Don't you know? We'll say it very loud
and slow: THEY. . . USED . . . TO . . . READ! They'd READ and READ, AND
READ and READ, and then proceed TO READ some more. Great Scott! Gadzooks!
One half their lives was reading books! The nursery shelves held books
galore! Books cluttered up the nursery floor! And in the bedroom, by the
bed, More books were waiting to be read! Such wondrous, fine, fantastic
tales Of dragons, gypsies, queens, and whales And treasure isles, and
distant shores Where smugglers rowed with muffled oars, And pirates wearing
purple pants, And sailing ships and elephants, And cannibals crouching
'round the pot, Stirring away at something hot. (It smells so good, what
can it be? Good gracious, its Penelope.) The younger ones had Beatrix
Potter With Mr. Tod, the dirty rotter, And Squirrel Nutkin, Pigling Bland,
And Mrs. Tiggy-Winkle and- Just How the Camel Got His Hump, And How The
Monkey Lost His Rump, And Mr. Toad, and bless my soul, There's Mr. Rat
and Mr. Mole- Oh books, what books they used to know, Those children living
long ago! So please, oh please, we beg, we pray, Go throw your TV set
away, And in its place you can install A lovely bookshelf on the wall.
Then fill the shelves with lots of books, Ignoring all the dirty looks,
The screams and yells, the bites and kicks, And children hitting you with
sticks- Fear not, because we promise you That, in about a week or two
Of having nothing else to do, They'll now begin to feel the need Of
having something good to read. And once they start-oh boy, oh boy! You
watch the slowly growing joy That fills their hearts. They'll grow so
keen They'll wonder what they'd ever seen In that ridiculous machine,
That nauseating, foul, unclean, Repulsive television screen! And later,
each and every kid Will love you more for what you did.        

I
Am A Teacher The following
is an excerpt from 32 THIRD GRADERS AND ONE CLASS BUNNY The author
is Phillip Done, a teacher of twenty years. He does an excellent job of telling
stories that occur in the classroom. If you have never taught, read this book
and you will experience what life is like as a teacher. You will laugh. If you
are a teacher, read this book. It will make you laugh and cry.
A teacher:
I read Charlotte's Web and /Charlie and the Chocolate Factory>every year,
and every year when Charlie finds the golden ticket and Charlotte dies, I cry.
take slivers out of fingers and bad sports out of steal the bacon. I know
when a child has gum in his mouth even when he is not chewing. I have sung "Happy
Birthday" 657 times. I hand over scissors with the handles up. My copies of
The Velveteen Rabbit and Treasure Island are falling apart. I can listen to
one child talk about his birthday party and another talk about her sleepover and
another talk about getting his stomach pumped last night - all at the same time. I
fix staplers that won't staple and zippers that won't zip, and I poke pins in
the orange caps of glue bottles that will not pour. I hand out papers and
pencils and stickers and envelopes for newly pulled teeth. I know the difference
between Austria and Australia. I plan lessons while shaving, showering, driving,
eating, and sleeping. I plan lessons five minutes before the bell rings.
I know what time it is when the big hand is on the twelve and the little >hand
is on the nine. I say the /r/ in /library/. I do not say the /w/ in /sword.
I put on Band-Aids and winter coats and school plays. I know they will
not understand the difference between /your/ and /you're. I know they will
write /to/ when it should be /too I say "Cover your mouth," after they have
coughed on me. I am a teacher. I examine new braces and new blisters and
holes in mouths where>teeth have just fallen out. I can spell vacuum. I
know the magic word. I wear four-leaf clovers and dandelions in my shirt pocket
that have just been picked with love at recess. I pray for snow days.
I pray for Stephen to be absent. I spend Thanksgiving vacation writing report
cards, Christmas vacation cleaning my classroom and summer vacation taking classes
on how to relax. I know the difference between a comma and an apostrophe.
I can say "apostrophe". I buy books about cats and dogs and sharks and volcanoes
and horses and dinosaurs. I turn jump ropes and am base in tag. I am glad
you can only get chicken pox once I correct pencil grips and spelling mistakes
and bad manners. I push in chairs all the way, push swings higher, and push
sleeves up while children are painting. I can touch the paper cutter. I own
one suit, two pairs of shoes, and eight boxes of graham crackers. I have every
teacher mug that Hallmark ever made and every save the Children tie too. I
say, "Use two hands!" when they carry their lunch trays. I say,"Accidents happen,"
after they did not use two hands. I wear green on Saint Patrick' s Day, red
on Valentine's day, and my bathrobe on Pajama Day. I poke straws into juice
boxes and untwist thermos lids that are too tight. I unpeel oranges that are too
tight. I sign library passes and yearbooks and new casts. I attend soccer
games and Little League championships and funerals for guinea pigs. I answer
to both "mom" and "dad." I am a teacher. I hope April Fool's Day
is on a Saturday. I blow up balloons that will not blow up. I always blow
the whistle early at recess. I can borrow and carry very fast. I give them
more time to answer six times eight than two times three. I never end a sentence
with a preposition. I know what a preposition is. I draw stars and smiley
faces. I say, "Take over," in four square games when I was not looking.
Once I forgot eight plus seven. I know when to say "can" and when to say "may."
I have worn green marker, red paint, yellow chalk dust, glue stick and glitter
all on the same day. I hate glitter. I always begin a sentence with a
capital and end it with a period. I always walk in line. I always lose
at arm wrestling. I leave "shuger" and "vilets" misspelled on their valentines.
I knowall of my continents and all of my oceans. I tape pages back into books.
I can find the end of the new roll of Scotch tape. I call on children
whose hands are not raised. I know that /colonel/ is a really hard word to
read, and so is /doubt/ and so is /gauge. I know kids will read /started/,
when it says /stared. I have spelled out /because/ and /beautiful/ and /friend
/six million times. I am a teacher. I look both ways before crossing
the street. I save balls stuck in >basketball hoops. I have given 842
spelling tests and have written "Have a Good Summer!" that many times too. I
collect milk boxes and coffee cans and egg cartons. I know all of my times
tables. I can type without looking. I know that two pretzels do not equal
one Hershey kiss. I can make a telescope out of a toilet paper roll and a
totem pole out of oatmeal boxes. I can make snowflakes out of coffee filters
and a space shuttle out of a Pringles can too. I know my notes because "Every
Good Boy Does Fine." I know my directions because I "Never Eat Slimy Worms."
I know all of my planets because "My Very Elegant Mother Just Sat Upon Nine
Pickles." And I can only say my ABCs if I sing them. I fix watchbands,
repair eyeglasses, and search for lost milk money after freeze tag. I know
when their fists will make a rock and when they will make scissors. I know when
a child does not understand. I know when a child is not telling the truth.
I know when a child was up too late last night. I know when a child needs
help finding a friend. I am a teacher. Teachers, I hope you all
have a great year. 
      
What Teachers Make, or You can
always go to law school if things don't work out By Taylor
Mali http://www.taylormali.com What
do you make? The dinner guests were sitting around
the table discussing life. One man, a CEO, decided to explain the problem with
education. He argued, "What's a kid going to learn from someone who decided
his best option in life was to become a teacher?" He reminded the other dinner
guests what they say about teachers: "Those who can, do. Those who can't,
teach." To stress his point he said to another guest, "You're a teacher, Susan.
Be honest. What do you make?" Susan, who had a reputation for honesty and
frankness replied, "You want to know what I make? I make kids work harder
than they ever thought they could. I make a C+ feel like the winner of the
Congressional Medal of Honor. I make kids sit through 40 minutes of study
hall in absolute silence." "You want to know what I make? I make kids
wonder. I make them question. I make them criticize. I make them apologize
and mean it. I make them write. I make them read, read, read. I make
them show all their work in math and perfect their final drafts in English."
"I make them understand that if you have the brains, and follow your heart, and
if someone ever tries to judge you by what you make, you must pay no attention
because they just didn't learn." Susan paused and then continued. "You
want to know what I make? I MAKE A DIFFERENCE. What do you make?"
http://www.csub.edu/~dgeorgi/Poetry/poems/WhatTeachersMake.htm         
Mmmmm...to put it all in perspective..... FINAL
EXAM This is the eighth grade final exam from 1895
in Salina, Kansas. It was taken from the original document on file at the Smokey
Valley Genealogical Society and Library in Salina, Kansas and reprinted by The
Salina Journal. (Anyone claiming 90% or better, please email your score to webmaster@proofmark.com
for listing on this page; braggarts will be retested and publicly humiliated.)
GRAMMAR (Time, one hour) 1. Give nine rules for the use of Capital
Letters. 2. Name the Parts of Speech and define those that have no modifications.
3. Define Verse, Stanza and Paragraph. 4. What are the Principal Parts
of a verb? Give Principal Parts of do, lie, lay, and run. 5. Define Case.
Illustrate each Case. 6. What is Punctuation? Give rules for principal marks
of Punctuation. 7 through 10. Write a composition of about 150 words and show
therein that you understand the practical use of the rules of grammar. ARITHMETIC
(Time, 1.25 hours) 1. Name and define the Fundamental Rules of Arithmetic.
2. A wagon box is 2 ft. deep, 10 feet long, and 3 ft. wide. How many bushels
of wheat will it hold? 3. If a load of wheat weighs 3942 lbs., what is it
worth at 50 cents/bushel, deducting 1050 lbs. for tare? 4. District No. 33
has a valuation of $35,000. What is the necessary levy to carry on a school for
seven months at $50 per month, and have $104 for incidentals? 5. Find cost
of 6720 lbs. of coal at $6.00 per ton. 6. Find the interest of $512.60 for
8 months and 18 days at 7 percent. 7. What is the cost of 40 boards 12 inches
wide and 16 ft. long at $20 per metre? 8. Find the bank discount on $300 for
90 days (no grace) at 10 percent. 9. What is the cost of a square farm at
$15 per acre, the distance around which is 640 rods? 10. Write a Bank Check,
a Promissory Note, and a Receipt. U.S. HISTORY (Time, 45 minutes) 1.
Give the epochs into which U.S. History is divided. 2. Give an account of
the discovery of America by Columbus. 3. Relate the causes and results of
the Revolutionary War. 4. Show the territorial growth of the United States.
5. Tell what you can of the history of Kansas. 6. Describe three of the
most prominent battles of the Rebellion. 7. Who were the following: Morse,
Whitney, Fulton, Bell, Lincoln, Penn, and Howe? 8. Name events connected with
the following dates: 1607 1620 1800 1849 1865 ORTHOGRAPHY(Time, one
hour) 1. What is meant by the following: alphabet, phonetic, orthography,
etymology, syllabication? 2. What are the elementary sounds? How are they
classified? 3. What are the following, and give examples of each: trigraph,
subvocals, diphthong, cognate letters, linguals? 4. Give four substitutes
for caret 'u'. 5. Give two rules for spelling words with final 'e'. Name two
exceptions under each rule. 6. Give two uses of silent letters in spelling.
Illustrate each. 7. Define the following prefixes and use in connection with
a word: bi, dis, mis, pre, semi, post, non, inter, mono, sup 8. Mark diacritically
and divide into syllables the following, and name the sign that indicates the
sound: card, ball, mercy, sir, odd, cell, rise, blood, fare, last. 9. Use
the following correctly in sentences: cite, site, sight, fane, fain, feign, vane,
vain, vein, raze, raise, rays. 10. Write 10 words frequently mispronounced
and indicate pronunciation by use of diacritical marks and by syllabication.
GEOGRAPHY(Time, one hour) 1. What is climate? Upon what does climate
depend? 2. How do you account for the extremes of climate in Kansas? 3.
Of what use are rivers? Of what use is the ocean? 4. Describe the mountains
of North America. 5. Name and describe the following: Monrovia, Odessa, Denver,
Manitoba, Hecla, Yukon, St. Helena, Juan Fernandez, Aspinwall and Orinoco. 6.
Name and locate the principal trade centers of the U.S. 7. Name all the republics
of Europe and give the capital of each. 8. Why is the Atlantic Coast colder
than the Pacific in the same latitude? 9. Describe the process by which the
water of the ocean returns to the sources of rivers. 10. Describe the movements
of the earth. Give the inclination of the earth. http://www.oldwestlibrary.com/OWL/kansas1895.htm         

Hurry!!
Hurry!! By Clydia Forehand "Hurry
up children don't lag behind!" "Please face the front; please stay
in line." "We've all got to hurry. We must take a test."
"And hope we are better than even the best." Way
at the back, a young girls on her knees Was not facing front; she was looking
at leaves. There on the ground, she held one to see She looked at it closely:
looked up at the trees. "Miss Griffey! Miss Griffey, could you tell
me how" "This leaf is so different from that one. Right NOW!"
"Miss Griffey! Miss Griffey,I just want to know" "Why
do leaves fall? And "How do leaves grow?" Miss
griffey was saddened; she wanted to teach. She wanted to show them the veins
in the leaf The wonders of chlorophyl; osmosis,too. Instead she said,"Please
do as I ask you to." The child put the leaf down and
stood in the line. They all had to hurry; it was almost time. The schedules
were set; the test was at nine. "Hurry up children; don't lag behind."
They all took the test:they did pretty well. Their scores
became data; not stories to tell. Somebody, someplace,entered those scores
And somebody, someplace compiled a report. Miss Griffey's
and all the other classes that year Were ranked in an order that made it quite
clear Who were the winners and who was in trouble And who'd better make
better scores in the future. Miss Griffey did well; the report
in the paper Make her and her class and her school look quite able To
teach things that mattered; to make sure kids learned And like every story;
this one's pages turned. The child in the back,who had looked
at the leaf; Been told not to dawdle; been taught not to see. Grew to
adulthood, a product of schools That taught how to test and to follow the
rules. Miss Griffey kept teaching; but teaching had changed
There were scripts now to follow. 'Please don't deviate" Said the words
in bold print at the top of each page Take the lessons in order, teach the
lessons the same. Test scores were rising, and, each year;
believe me Everyone said how much the kids were achieving "They're
learning so much" People said to each other. It's so good to know now
that schools aren't in trouble. And Sarah, that young girl,
who'd once found the leaf, Soon learned NOT to look; soon learned NOT to see.
Like everyone else, she walked in a line. 'Cause she had been taught she could
not lag behind. There are so many children,
from so many places To test for conformity really erases. All that they
are; all that they dream All that they look for and all that they see. Taught
NOT to question; taught Not to ask. Stay in your seat; stick to the task.
Each one so different; each boy and each girl. They are lag behind children
in a hurry up world.        

Go
out and change the world. The more you study, the more you should have- A
GOAL you should be pursuing: A DREAM you should be launching:
A PLAN you should be executuing: A PROJECT you should be startuing:
A POSSIBIITY you should be exploring: An OPPORTUNITY you should
be grabbing: A IDEA you should be working: A PROBLEM you
should be tackling: A DECISION you should be making: The greatest
force in the world is a POSITIVE idea. anonymous         
You never known the results of a simple
kind act.... His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish
farmer. One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry
for help coming from a nearby bog. He dropped his tools and ran to the bog. There,
mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling
to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow
and terrifying death. The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's
sparse surroundings. An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced
himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved. "I want to repay
you," said the nobleman. "You saved my son's life." "No, I can't accept payment
for what I did," the Scottish farmer replied waving off the offer. At that
moment, the farmer's own son came to the door of the family hovel. "Is that your
son?" the nobleman asked. "Yes," the farmer replied proudly. "I'll make
you a deal. Let me provide him with the level of education my own son will enjoy.
If the lad is anything like his father, he'll no doubt grow to be a man we both
will be proud of." And that he did. Farmer Fleming's son attended the very
best schools and in time, graduated from St. Mary's Hospital Medical School in
London, and went on to become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander
Fleming, the discoverer of Penicillin. Years afterward, the same nobleman's
son who was saved from the bog was stricken with pneumonia. What saved his
life this time? Penicillin! The name of the nobleman? Lord Randolph
Churchill. His son's name? Sir Winston Churchill. Someone once said:
What goes around comes around.         
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